Nonno & Parampara

Nonno always kept his Dritsti on the truth. He didn't care about much else. At least that was my experience of him. I spent most of my teens and early twenties hiding myself under jewelry, funky hairdos, and ridiculous outfits, then one day I showed up for lunch without any of it; just a dress. Nonno opened the door and said, with enthusiasm and something that felt like he had been waiting for the arrival of this day, “ah, there you are, finally”

Nonno was unbothered by my lack of interest in him, or my overall shitty behavior that got me in trouble everywhere else. I think he actually appreciated the defiant rebel in me, he always admired me. He patiently watched from a distance, bought my love with investments in my studies and at every juncture received me with books, which I never read. Apparently we had the same interests…photography, theater and then Yoga it turns out. 

When I did my first Yoga teacher training he was unmoved by the news, he asked about what I learned and abstained from making any statement. However when I came back from my first trip to India eager to share the experience with him, he lit up. “Ah” as he always started his exchanges with me “a real yogi in the family, brava Beatrice” 

He gave me a massive stack of books on Yoga - Indra Devi, Iyengar and some others I can’t remeber. I always failed to pay much attention to him, but he didn’t care. I found out from my dad that he practiced headstand every morning, he discovered this not because Nonno told him, but because he was living with him for some time, and in the morning when he would wake up at 6am and find Nonno in a headstand on the carpet in the living room. My dad would go about preparing for his day and when he’d leave, Nonno would still be in a headstand. Nonno never talked about it. It took some years for me to get wise, but once I got a little sense in me, I began to ask.

Nonno practiced the moon diet which meant he would fast on the new moon and increase the amount of food he had up until the full moon and then begin decreasing the amount of food until the new moon fasting. He forced this upon my grandma who then ate secretly, along with smoking. He practiced specific asanas, and some pranayama. He said that he dropped all his asana once he turned 70 and all he did after that until 80 was tree pose. He said Tree pose is the ultimate pose and all we need. He always showcased his tree pose capabilities at the table. At 80 he stopped all practices, including the moon diet. He began to feast. Sadly my grandma was gone by then so she never got to feast in the open. 

I'll never really know if my grandpa was the asshole some described him to be, or a sage in everyday clothes trying to teach all a brutal kind of lesson. I always ignored him, he always adored me. He was in World War two and lived through a lot, my sister has taken great interest in his life.

The one thing I know is that I strongly feel he held a secret of parampara which no one knew about, when the desire for Yoga arose in me, he made the knowledge accessible to me, he said the people of India know the truth. Looking back I feel the river of parampara flowed through my family long before me, I was just the next one to swim in it consciously. 

Nonno kept his Dristi, on knowledge. He collected vinyls, art and books, he immersed himself in reading and he debated with great fierceness, he was steady and he lived to be almost 101. He was quite disgruntled at the end of his life because he felt his body did not match the power of his mind. I was not a good grandchild. He died in his sleep this week with a crystal clear, sharp mind and a tired old body. Had his body kept up he may have lived on forever.

The term paramparā refers to the lineage of knowledge passed down through generations. This tradition emphasizes the continuity of wisdom, ensuring that valuable teachings are preserved and adapted over time. In ancient India, education was not just about acquiring information but about understanding the interconnectedness of all life forms. This holistic approach is encapsulated in the concept of dṛṣṭi, which means seeing or perceiving the world in a comprehensive and integrated manner. - Anuradha Choudry